“I’ve heard it hundreds of times: I’m looking for a church that meets my needs. Can you admit for a moment how incredibly unbiblical that statement is?”
--Craig Groeschel, Senior Pastor, lifechurch.tv
I ran across this statement the other day and was struck by how familiar it feels, how I can relate. One of the hardest aspects of working with students is encouraging them to connect with a local church. Yes, I’m going to pick on students, but this tirade has much much broader application, and I have to confess that during my time as a typical student at the University of Oregon, “I am the worst of them.”
After pure, unadulterated sloth the excuse I receive most often as to why a student hasn’t connected with a local church is that they haven’t found ‘the right church,’ but when pressed on what that is, ninety-nine times out of a hundred they fall back to ‘one that meets my needs.’ It’s a consumer mentality. They want a church they can really ‘get something out of.’ It rarely, if ever, occurs to them that they should really be seeking a place they can give something back to. There are, of course, exceptions, but most want a place where they can sit with a large group of people who look, talk, act and smell like them so they can all feel comfortable doing as little as Christianly possible. OUCH! And yes, I just made up a new word, but try to focus on the point, which is that we have GOT to get better at challenging one another to live richer lives in Christ (Hebrews 10:24-25). And I believe that begins by connecting more closely with the entire body of Christ, not just those parts that seem most attractive to us.
Statistically we, who claim to follow Jesus, who claim to be empowered by the Holy Spirit of the Living God, are nearly identical to the world around us. (I say nearly because the argument can be made that we’re actually a little worse off.) Statistically we are NOT being transformed by the renewing of our minds, but instead doing a nifty job of conforming to the world (Romans 12:1-2). Perhaps if we disciplined our bodies a bit more rigorously (1 Corinthians 9:27) we’d be a bit more likely to actually share the light of Christ with the world.
What would happen, do you suppose, if a million college students actually went to bed one Saturday night (while it was still was Saturday night and not Sunday morning), got a good night’s sleep and went to church on Sunday with a mindset of giving instead of receiving? What if a million students walked into sanctuaries across America next week and asked all those pastors, “What can I do to help?” My guess is that once the shock wore off we’d see a revival break out. Of course, that assumes that the students are actually willing to serve in whatever capacity the church leaders see fit. I’ll never forget hearing one of my seminary professors, whom I greatly admire, tell us that the one of the best things we could do to prepare ourselves as pastors was serve in a church nursery for a year. Rocking babies and entertaining three-year-olds may not seem like much, but it’s actually some of the most valuable service you can offer. Likewise, vacuuming the sanctuary or cleaning the church bathrooms or mowing the lawn around the building; all amazing feats of ministry that many Christians haven’t got the spiritual maturity to handle. Helping park cars for Jesus makes a difference! What would happen if a million college students gave an hour a week—or even half an hour!—to help the local church?
The unfortunate truth is that we may never know. Because the typical student goes to a church once, and if they don’t see a large group of other students milling aimlessly about they leave and never come back. And whether it is called ‘church shopping’ or ‘church hopping’ the result is the same. They walk in with a Me First mentality and look for the exit at the first sign of discomfort. They walk in looking for an excuse to not come back! Ouch.
Now, if you’re a college student and you’re reading this, don’t act all surprised and offended. First, you know I’m generally right, and second, it’s not all your fault. The vast majority of you grew up in churches where were were marginalized from birth. I know, I know, that sounds ridiculous, but think about it. How involved are the youth and children of your church in the life of the congregation? Not, how central, how involved? Kids generally are central to a church; they tend to get their share of space and money from the budget, parents wouldn’t have it any other way, but what is expected of them? Are they ever invited to business meetings? Are they included in planning for outreaches and celebrations? Do they as individuals and a group have any responsibilities to the body of the local church? Or are they coddled?
I serve in an association of over 50 churches. Every year we meet to talk about what’s going on with one another and discuss any pressing business. Then we break for a meal and have some sort of ministry rally. During that time we traditionally have one rally for adults and one for youth… in separate locations. Now, the youth rally is really cool, with good speakers and a kickin’ band and lots of kids are effected deeply by the experience, which is awesome. However, think about this for a minute. We’ve taken them away from the rest of the church. They have no responsibilities at the main meetings, no input, no expectations, no involvement whatsoever. Nothing. Nada. ZERO. They DO have an awesome time with one another in a controlled environment where they don’t have to do much other than show up and hang out with other youth. And that’s the problem. All they see is one another and that’s the view they develop of what a healthy church should look like, and it’s wrong. Listen, people argue about what a healthy church looks like all the time, but everyone agrees that it’s multi-generational. You need senior adults and children and people of all ages to really understand what the body of Christ was meant to be. To give up, or substitute a generic campus ministry (as I did and many other students continue to do) and call that ‘church,’ is a cop out.
Sometimes we do the most damage with the best intentions. We have a tendency to keep the bar low for our kids, spiritually, and wonder why they underachieve later. This generation of college students grew up getting trophies for being on the team, as if that was an accomplishment, they had kindergarten graduation parties; they were spoiled. We’ve given them everything we could except self-esteem. They’ve never had to work for accolades so they feel entitled. They are the children of the original “me” generation, and true to form (at least when it comes to church), they’re as self-centered as their parents. We’ve valued such that they don’t understand value. In a sense, we’ve denied them hard labor, and we’re surprised that they’re soft.
So, in order to avoid the ‘cranky old man’ label, I’m not only going to sound the alarm like a good watchman, I’m going to offer a couple of solutions.
Solution 1: Responsibility—Churches need to get children, youth and students used to having responsibilities early on. Let them clean a couple of Sunday School rooms when they’re young, help take the offering or light candles or help with the audio/visual systems as they get older, and give them a place in front of the congregation as opportunity arises. In America you have to be 35 to be president, but in far too many churches you have to be over 65 to pray in front of the church…
Solution 2: Involvement—Get youth and college students involved in the business of the body. Yes, that means inviting them to business meetings and even encouraging them to talk and give input on decisions. No, you don’t have to do everything they say, but if you don’t train them to speak, don’t be surprised by their silence. As a man sows, so shall he reap…
Solution 3: Expectation—Or accountability. If we’re going to get younger generations to participate in body life, we have to raise the bar for them and hold them accountable for reaching it. This means giving establishing goals and consequences for them. We have to give them a path to follow and apply both the carrot and stick to keep them on it. Keeping with the farm metaphor, how do train an ox? You put the younger one with an older one to guide it along until it knows how to do the job. We’re not doing that much in America today, and we’re paying for it with generations who aren’t looking to till a field, just munch the grass they find growing on it.
Can I be honest here? I think that students today represent the best hope the world has for real change. Your passion for social justice is overwhelming. Your desire for relationship is incredible. Your environmental awareness is nearly omnipresent. And your empowerment is at an all-time high. Never have so many had so much to do so good. If only you would stand up and seize that potential! If only you would become the leaders you were meant to be!
We all know people are basically selfish. Face it, you are. I am. Every child coming straight from the womb is entirely self-centered. I’m not saying that’s wrong, but it is a problem you have to overcome. But that’s not my point. My point is that selfish people often do selfish things. Slavery? Selfish. Rape? Selfish. Physical abuse? Selfish. Selfish. Greed? Selfish. Pride? Selfish. That burning desire to do what YOU want to do is what drives us. And sometimes that leads us to accomplish great things, but let’s not pretend to altruistic motives for progress just yet. The United States first landed a man on the moon not because we wanted to explore outer space, but because we wanted to beat the Soviets to the “high ground” in a war of nuclear proliferation. Drug companies spend millions of dollars on research to cure diseases not just to help people, but because billions of dollars are at stake.
People are basically selfish. And selfish people do selfish things, often to one another. And for that reason there is a ton of social evil in the world. People are killing each other. Children are starving. Poverty, illiteracy, homelessness—take your pick, they’re all out there; sexual slavery, genocide, drug abuse... The world is full of bad things. But they’re often preventable. And your generation knows that. Your generation cares. And that compassion can drive you to do great things, good things for the right reasons. Don’t let that slip away.
Keep following the dream of a better world. Keep volunteering at shelters. Keep giving to charities. Keep shopping at socially aware businesses. Keep writing letters to the editor of your local paper about the injustice you see and the opportunities to fix it. Keep planning your careers and families around the idea that your life matters not just to you, but to the entire world. Keep starting socially aware businesses. And above all else, keep positive. Don’t get dragged down by news of defeat. Don’t sink to the level of violence and deceit that you’re trying to abolish. Don’t give in to the money. “The love of money is a root of all kinds of evil…” You and your generation can change the world, but you have to commit yourself, your whole life to that idea.
